Viva Las Vegas - Part 1

What an amazing place. Rising out of the desert like a neon-lit oasis, Las Vegas was a place we'd been alternately dreading and dying to see. Would it be the ultra-tacky, fake Elvis-infested dive of Johnny's nightmares or the breathtakingly opulent backdrop of Bec's jackpot-winning dreams? Well it turns out that while it is undoubtedly a unique and hilarious vacation destination, almost every silver lining has an associated cloud...

As we arrived on the Vegas Strip the top came down and we soaked in the atmosphere. Which unfortunately was mostly carbon monoxide. As opposed to the old Vegas (Fremont Street), The Strip is 8 lanes wide and pretty much heaves with traffic 24/7. Our introduction was also slightly spoilt by getting lost trying to find our way into the car park at the super-premium Mandalay Bay Hotel and Casino.


However things quickly turned around once we got to our room, undoubtedly the most luxurious we've ever been in, featuring a massive plasma TV, monster bathtub and mesmerising views up The Strip. But on the (obligatory for Vegas) flip-side, our extortionate room rate didn't include breakfast or wireless internet - something we'd virtually taken for granted, even in rooms costing a third as much!

We figured we should get to know our "local" first and as such spent the first evening entirely within the mega-complex of Mandalay Bay. But before we knew it, it was 11pm and almost all the restaurant options were shut! It also became apparent that the casino's apparent generosity (free drinks if you're gambling - or appear to be gambling!) does not extend to its numerous restaurants. Luckily we'd gone through the hunger barrier and really only needed a snack, so we ended up ordering an appetiser - Nachos to share. What came out would probably have fed an entire Mexican township:


We did our best, but about half of the nachos went back to the kitchen, no doubt to be scraped into the bin along with who-knows-how-many other tons of waste this place must produce daily. Quite a sobering thought. Our first impression of the gambling at Mandalay Bay was also that it was extremely expensive - it didn't seem to be possible to risk less than $15 at a time on any table game, which is too much for us high rollers. We made friends with an extremely-drunk Jamaican dude playing poker, who advised that Mandalay was definitely one of the premium-priced casino floors, and to try "a few doors up" for more affordable tables. But as it was already 3am we decided to call it a night. Where did the time go? We have no idea! Damn free drinks...

The next day we took our Caribbean friend's advice and ventured up the strip, through the impressive Egyptian-themed pyramid, Luxor:


and into the hilariously-tacky mock-medieval castle, Excalibur:


While undoubtedly dodgy, Excalibur did have some redeeming qualities, namely that we could gamble at $5 a pop, and also that they ran free poker lessons. Now we both know how to play Texas Hold'em, but had never played at a casino before, and poker rooms are very intimidating places at the best of times, so it was great to get some tips on the etiquette of playing in Vegas. Of course, at the conclusion of the lesson, there is an opportunity to turn your new-found skills into cash by playing your classmates, which we both agreed to try. Bec bombed out quite early but Johnny hung in for a while, experiencing the uniquely heart-pounding thrill of winning a poker hand, for real money, in Vegas, with a big bluff.